Transgender rights are human rights

A Guy Who Falls in Love To a Transgender Woman

03/03/2013 03:42

Loving that girl of mine

Chris met Iya through a “‘ladyboy’ dating site,” as Chris puts it. But he remembers that as soon as she opened her camera for a cam chat, “I fell in love with her that very moment.” And a loving relationship has been formed.

 

Initially, that Iya is transgender was an issue “because I thought, ‘My gosh, I’m gay now!’” But through Iya, “I realized that gender should not matter when you love.”

Chris met Iya through a “‘ladyboy’ dating site,” as Chris put it, “almost two years ago. At that time I felt I wanted to have a relationship with a ‘ladyboy’ – in the past, I only had relations with biological females, but I was always attracted to (so-called) ‘she-males’. I came to a point in my life when I realized that I adored them.”

Chris and Iya started chatting after Chris saw photographs of Iya, and “I liked them a lot, so I started a conversation with her.” The chatting led to emailing, and “some weeks later, we did a cam chat. I remember that as soon as she opened her camera, I fell in love with her that very moment.”

Chris stressed: “I knew, of course, she is a transgender.”

Initially, that Iya is transgender was an issue “because I thought, ‘My gosh, I’m gay now!’” But through Iya, “I realized that gender should not matter when you love.”

“The best thing about our relationship is that we have no secrets from each other,” Chris said. “We can talk about everything.”

For Chris, Iya’s “beauty outside comes from her beauty from inside… and every time I look at her and talk to her, I feel a warm and tender feeling in my heart.”

People in Chris’s (and by extension, Iya’s) life, including Chris’s family, his friends, and even his co-workers all know that Iya is a transgender woman. “And they all respect that. And the people who personally know her also respect her, me and our relationship. I really never heard any bad words from other people (about what we have). In fact, they are all happy for me.”

Chris, nonetheless, admits that there were some “doubts” raised to him before, with these questions including: “Do you think you can get her here to Germany?”, and “Do you think she is honest to you?” Chris, however, accepted these questions as “normal,” since “they are my people, I know they just want me to feel happy in love.”

Chris has visited Iya at her hometown twice already, and it was at those times that he spoke with other transpinays. “I heard about the discrimination of transgenders in the Philippines – that they don’t have equal rights, that they can’t even find jobs like other people do. I wish I can do something about that, to make people more open-minded, and also make the bosses more open-minded to give transgenders a chance to do a regular job.”

Chris knows that – realistically – not everyone may like LGBTs. “That’s okay by me if people say: ‘I don’t like this or that’,” he said. “But there is never any reason to discriminate.”

To others who also fall for transgender women, Chris has this to say: “If you are happy in love, no matter what the gender may be of the person you love, enjoy what you have. Stand up and show your transgender woman you really love her – and not only with words because, truly, actions always speak louder than words.”

It is this focus on the happiness of finding each other than strengthens Chris’s relationship with his “future wife”. “I say, call me gay, all me bisexual, call me straight – I don’t care. I call it… love.”

 

Shared by:  Outrage Maganize

Association of Transgender People in the Philippines (ATP)

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